Our common goop.

I have gone so far away from things, from people, all in an effort to find myself.
Which is ironic.
Since I believe that we are all connected.
Most of the time.
At the bare minimum, we all seem to share this existence called life, on this planet called earth that ends in something we refer to as death. These, for me, are our commonalities; existence, location, death. Past those things we are a melting pot of human goo…so sticky and stuck together that it’s hard to find, to state, to be individual.
And so perhaps, we walk away. We pull ourselves free from the goop and we stand back and look at it.
We judge it.
We recoil from it as if to say,
I was never a part of you,
and if I were,
I know better now.
And then something goes missing. Something begins to fall apart from the inside out and it would seem,
Though we can neither confirm nor deny the truth of it,
That the goop is what held our individuality in place.
Because as time goes by, we begin to feel less ourselves.
Or more ourselves, but suddenly in pieces.
I’m walking along and suddenly, my hand falls off and begins to inch its way back towards the other hands.
Curious.
I had begun to hate holding a hand.
I guess I had forgotten how many hands there were to hold-
and what it was we shared that held us together.
The snow is falling so heavy now outside my window…
and you are not here to share it.
Maybe because I wouldn’t let you be-
And maybe because you couldn’t let yourself be-
And maybe because if i weren’t here to see it alone,
I’d never know how badly I want to say to someone,
“Come here! Hurry and see the snow falling! Isn’t it beautiful?”
I’d never know that I want to go stand in the middle of the pasture and spin in the flakes…
And I’d never wonder…
Hope…
Wish…
That someone would stand on the porch and watch me do it.
That my daughters could hold my hands and spin with me-
all held together, those hands of theirs and mine, by the invisible,
most necessary, absolutely perfect,
I am without a doubt a part of, goop, that I call life.

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  1. #1 by zoe on November 24, 2014 - 10:08 am

    “Wish…
    That someone would stand on the porch and watch me do it.
    That my daughters could hold my hands and spin with me-
    all held together, those hands of theirs and mine, by the invisible,
    most necessary, absolutely perfect,
    I am without a doubt a part of, goop, that I call life.”
    My bucket list includes you and the girls, I would so like to see your wonderous face again and meet your beautiful daughters. Please remember that I love you, unconditionally zoe

    • #2 by foundedna on November 24, 2014 - 9:35 pm

      I need to make this happen for you. I love you too….

  2. #3 by stephlookingup on November 24, 2014 - 5:02 pm

    Beautiful. I am glad you posted this. Thank you for sharing.

    • #4 by foundedna on November 24, 2014 - 9:36 pm

      Thank you for reading it 😉

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